My Secret Quest to Date the Apocalypse

Reed Halloran bought the game with money he saved for his ex-girlfriend's birthday. Then he picked Herbalist. Three days later he's still level one, lost in a PvP zone, standing in a ruined cathedral under a red moon in front of the one boss in Sunder Online nobody is supposed to be able to kill. He hands her a flower. It was in his bag. She kills him. But right before she does, a bar appears under Quests with her name on it and a number nobody has ever seen: 0.01%. So he comes back. With tea. She kills him. With a sickle. She kills him harder. With a piece of silk worth six silver, and she looks at it for a long time first. A hundred deaths later, the biggest guild on the server is hunting her, their scout is his ex, and Reed has a color-coded spreadsheet of every way the strongest thing in the game has taken him apart. He can't fight. He can't tell anyone. He can die, though. He's really good at that. Forty million players want her dead. One of them wants a second date.